Saturday 2 June 2012

AP and me - part 3

Over the past few weeks, the transition from baby to toddler was the start of an "Attachment Parenting evolution". Breastfeeding, cosleeping and babywearing were working like a charm but AP "rules" can get a bit nebulous as babies get older. So I went again with my mom instinct...

Disclaimer: This is what happened with my little family but each family is different and what worked for us might not work for get the concept.

I'm one on those lucky people who never had any problems breastfeeding. Alice was a natural and, according to the nurse, I have awesome nipples! However, my incredibly fast metabolism (my doctor made me drink horrible protein shakes to help me keep some precious pregnancy fat) made breastfeeding a bit intense as Alice was heading to her first birthday. As a result of loosing too much weight, breastfeeding Alice on demand left me physically drained, dizzy by moments and stuck with annoying little headaches. Consequently, I'm now only feeding Alice 2-3 times a day and for "special occasions".

To be honest, cosleeping turned out to be a bitch a few months ago. Getting kicked in the face numerous time during the night was slowly getting on my nerves (and on Dan's nerves). It was time to move the little lady in her own bed, in her own nursery and to cut most of the night booby snacks...hopefully without any drama. Luckily, for us, Jamie from Hank and Lucy sent me a great link Sleeping Through the Night Without Tears. I could not believed my eyes that, after 13 months in the family bed, Alice was now taking her naps and sleeping peacefully at night in her bed. As much as I didn't have faith in the process (a 3 phases plan over 10 days created by Dr. Jay Gorda), it worked wonderfully and without drama *doing a happy little dance*...only a bit of frustration the first two nights.

*doing another happy little dance*  Babywearing is still our main way of transportation. Thanks to our long and lean genetic disposition, Alice (at a constant 25th percentile), is still very comfortable to carry. I know many moms who recently had to welcome the stroller as a full time device because they were having unpleasant back pain. I'm aware that I won't be able to carry Alice in my Ergo forever so I try to enjoy every mom & daughter moments that we have together using the baby carrier (even on very hot and humid days).    

To me, AP is not about being a slave to your child and forgetting yourself. To the opposite, I think that it is more about working as a team with your kid (and your partner) and respecting your limits. A happy mom will always be a better matter what kind of parental style she decides to do!


little wild moose said...

Thanks for such an honest post Claudia. I too have been struggling with severe health issues for months (also due to how much Everly breastfeeds) and will need to cut down her feeds. She is 1 on Wednesday so we will also start the night-weaning process in a month or so as she still feeds several times a night. I simply can't go on like this for much longer! (I've had that Dr Gordon article bookmarked for months, waiting for this moment.) I completely agree - a happy mum will always be a better mum! x

Daniela said...

Thank you for telling your side of AP. I think in many ways, AP is, as you say, about following your instincts and following your childs lead. What ever works for each family. I think, without knowing, I have been doing a lot of the things AP is all about (baby wearing, breasfeeding, listening to the childs cues, for example), so, that is what it is, instincts.
Good for you and your lovely family! I love to see how Alice is growing into a little girl!!! Wow, how fast time has passed!

jamie said...

boy i am on a comment-fest today, huh?

i am curious how you used that sleep training method to get her OUT of the bed?

H is pretty much night weaned, but still wakes several times in the night and needs a little pat on the back in order to resettle, and i have been sleeping in the other room to avoid temptation for night nursing. how the heck to get him to sleep all night in a crib? maybe we should email....