Tuesday 8 March 2011

Mommy talks with Juliette

The birth story of Juliette, crafter extraordinaire, married, with one son and two cats, will be the last "Mommy Talks" before I give birth. Even if she answered my questions a while ago, I wanted to wait until the end of my pregnancy to publish them. Juliette had a very interesting point in her text and it made me wonder during my entire pregnancy: do I feel pressure by my own birth and go the “natural way”?

Today, I have to complete my birth plan
. I will keep Juliette's answers in mind while I write it down...while I try to stay true to myself! Tomorrow, I will tell you how it went!!!

What was your birth plan?
Secretly, all I ever wanted is to be asleep while I had a c-section. Having grown up in France, that was definitely an option. My mother, on the other hand, went to a special “no violence” clinic to give birth. It wasn’t even in the city she lived in! Let’s just say that I felt pressured by my own birth as well as the American women around me to try and go the “natural way”.

Of course I should mention that I had many abdominal surgeries, that it was a miracle I got pregnant and kept the baby in the first place. In the end, the scar tissues inside my abdomen started tearing and I had a scheduled c-section when the baby reached term.

My body never went into labor, I don’t know to this day what a contraction feels like. It turned out that Finn was bigger than expected and my OB thinks that had we waited longer a c-section was unavoidable as my body doesn’t seem to know how to go into labor.

Finn birth ended up being my version of nonviolent. I was never in pain and recovered very quickly. I am just perfectly content about the way it all came about and never think of it as a failure on my part. After all, I was not even supposed to be able to conceive.

How did you prepare physically and mentally for childbirth?
I tried yoga for a while but my body just got bigger and bigger. I think I gained a pound a week. I always thought I would be one of those skinny pregnant women but that is not what happened. I suffered all the nausea, water retention, insomnia and sciatica anyone might hear about pregnancy. To make time go quickly I started my blog and read the entire Harry Potter series. It was great fun! My friends would point out that I also spent an inordinate amount of time eating peanut m&m’s and clementines.

Who was with you during labour and birth?
I really never wanted anyone with me in the labour room. I think my husband was grateful for it. I walked with him to the operation room and he just waited on a chair in the hallway. We are just pretty low key that way.

Did everything go according to your birth plan?
Everything and nothing!

What is your best childbirth advice?
Be yourself. If you want a home birth, do it. If you want a c-section, be your own advocate. Don’t feel bad. There is no reward given out for the mother that suffered the most without an epidural.

Thank you so much Juliette


Vanessa said...

From someone who has always secretly wanted to have this baby via C-section, thank you! I do feel alot of social pressure from friends/family to go the natural way, so that's what I've been planning on this whole time. But this gives me something to think about.

(Eden is due in 1.5 weeks! I can't believe she's almost here!)

roberta jane said...

Thank you for the refreshing perspective. Although I would like to try to have a natural birth, I do not feel the need to judge people based on their birthing choices. Everyone should do what feels right for them mentally and physically. If the final outcome is a healthy and happy baby and mom then everyone wins.

Bonney said...

Claudia, Is there a pattern for the bunny and blanket somewhere? It's VERY cute!

Allie said...

I just happened across your blog today, and I love it! I'm very impressed with how much you are learning, and asking about ahead of time, I sure wish I had. I wish you and yours all the best.

UK lass in US said...

I don't think that anyone normal would judge someone by their birth plan - contractions are not something that I would go out and tell my friends that they 'must try' them... On the other hand, the idea of being incapacitated to a degree for a week or so, relying on MY husband and being stuck in a hospital did worry me more...

sally said...

Giving birth is just wonderful no what method you use. I had a normal delivery with my first child and then had to go the route of c-section for my last two. They were large babies and I am a petite person. But much like this interview with the last two kids I never went into labor. But no matter what way you do it the minute that baby comes out you fall in love and know that miracles do exist. Good Luck.