Little lumberjack

 

 

It is always surprising when, one morning, you wake up to discover that your daughter chewed the paint off "your" carefully selected crib!

You can buy crib rail guard protectors but all the reviews that I read were mediocre. So, I took the sewing machine out of the closet for a little project.

What you need:
cute fabric
absorbent fabric (ex: thick cotton jersey)
bias tape
ribbon (ex: bias tape)
...a few hours if your baby is not taking a nap!

1) Measure your crib rail

2) Cut cute fabric 

3) Evaluate how many layers (ex: 3) of absorbent fabric you need to protect the rail...babies have very destructive little teeth. Cut absorbent fabric. 

4) Pin all layers together and quilt for stability (ex: every inch)

5) Cover the raw edges with bias tape (binding)

6) Install a few ribbons (ex: 5)

note: To achieve a "clean" look (I didn't want to see the ribbon...I failed at using snaps and buttons looked a bit dangerous!), I only stitched a few inches of the ribbon in the middle of the "teething quilt"...not all the way to the edge (see last picture). By doing that "technique", the ribbons are "invisible".

On a rainy day...

...after lunch and before Alice's afternoon nap.

1) acting silly in front of the mirror

2) playing with her new favorite toy from the second hand store

3) finding the perfect tune (and the perfect volume!)

4) puting crayons in her mouth while daddy creates UNIBUN!!!

5) riding her awesome rocking sheep

I hope that you had a lovely weekend

xox

AP and me - part 3

Over the past few weeks, the transition from baby to toddler was the start of an "Attachment Parenting evolution". Breastfeeding, cosleeping and babywearing were working like a charm but AP "rules" can get a bit nebulous as babies get older. So I went again with my mom instinct...

Disclaimer: This is what happened with my little family but each family is different and what worked for us might not work for everybody...you get the concept.

Breastfeeding:
I'm one on those lucky people who never had any problems breastfeeding. Alice was a natural and, according to the nurse, I have awesome nipples! However, my incredibly fast metabolism (my doctor made me drink horrible protein shakes to help me keep some precious pregnancy fat) made breastfeeding a bit intense as Alice was heading to her first birthday. As a result of loosing too much weight, breastfeeding Alice on demand left me physically drained, dizzy by moments and stuck with annoying little headaches. Consequently, I'm now only feeding Alice 2-3 times a day and for "special occasions".

Cosleeping:
To be honest, cosleeping turned out to be a bitch a few months ago. Getting kicked in the face numerous time during the night was slowly getting on my nerves (and on Dan's nerves). It was time to move the little lady in her own bed, in her own nursery and to cut most of the night booby snacks...hopefully without any drama. Luckily, for us, Jamie from Hank and Lucy sent me a great link Sleeping Through the Night Without Tears. I could not believed my eyes that, after 13 months in the family bed, Alice was now taking her naps and sleeping peacefully at night in her bed. As much as I didn't have faith in the process (a 3 phases plan over 10 days created by Dr. Jay Gorda), it worked wonderfully and without drama *doing a happy little dance*...only a bit of frustration the first two nights.

Babywearing:
*doing another happy little dance*  Babywearing is still our main way of transportation. Thanks to our long and lean genetic disposition, Alice (at a constant 25th percentile), is still very comfortable to carry. I know many moms who recently had to welcome the stroller as a full time device because they were having unpleasant back pain. I'm aware that I won't be able to carry Alice in my Ergo forever so I try to enjoy every mom & daughter moments that we have together using the baby carrier (even on very hot and humid days).    

To me, AP is not about being a slave to your child and forgetting yourself. To the opposite, I think that it is more about working as a team with your kid (and your partner) and respecting your limits. A happy mom will always be a better mom...no matter what kind of parental style she decides to do!

Things I do when Alice is sleeping...

...a little herb garden nested in an old metal drawer

  

 

...a cover for a mini ironing board found in the trash

 

 

...a ribbon on my fedora (matching your ironing board is awesome!)

 

Have a lovely weekend!
xox

New labels

 

A few months ago, I was convinced that Alice was a Spirited Child. It sounds paradoxical since I wrote many time on this blog that she is a very easy kid. Easy she is but she also has a lot of energy...energy that she uses to climb furniture, empty baskets, chase pets, unplug wires, break stuff, open drawers, move chairs, "ride" and fall from her car seat (I didn't know that a ear could bleed that much!)...you get the idea.

After one too many "Energizer Bunny" comments, I got a copy of Raising Your Spirited Child: A Guide for Parents Whose Child Is More Intense, Sensitive, Perceptive, Persistent, Energetic. I completed the little quiz at the beginning of the book and realized that calling Alice a Spirited Child would be a complete insult to any parent who is actually dealing with real "strong-willed" or "difficult" child. She was categorized in the "Low-Key Cool Child" (there is also "Spunky Child" and "Spirited Child"). In other words, Alice is...drum roll please...a normal kid (not that the kids falling in the two other categories are not normal)! Anyway.

There is a small section in the book dedicated to labels and how to redesign them. Totally fascinating.

We all, kids and adults, get labels that are at time positive or negative. Spirited Children are often tagged with numerous miserable labels (stubborn, wild, picky, obnoxious, manipulative, etc.) that, in the long run, can be devastating. Even positive parents can fall in the negative labels trap...especially when the labels are told by teachers, nurses or day care workers.

The author invites the readers to project a new and positive image hoping that it will have an impact on the kids self esteem and behavior. It looks simple but it is not that easy to change labels that stick on people for a long time.

To illustrate my point, I will give you a silly example. My 5 year old cockapoo, Brian, has a couple negative labels but the most frequent are "smelly", "unkept", "scared" and "barky".

Now, instead of apologizing for my "smelly", "unkept", "scared" and "barky" dog, I tell people that Brian is "musky", "naturally wooly", "prudent" and "vocal". Sounds ridiculous but it works...even for a dog. I did it a few times with strangers and this guaranteed Brian a lot of friendly coos. Now think what this little exercise can do to a child and his family.

And for your information, Alice is not intense...she is curious and enthusiastic :)

AP and me - part 2

We visited every grocery, magazine and corner stores in my predominant French neighborhood to get a copy of Time magazine. We didn't find it but we think there should be a law forcing business owners to hide porn magazines properly! Long story short, Dan managed to find an online copy for me.

Sadly, the article was a disappointment. With such a "controversial" cover, I expected a jaw dropping text. There is a reason why the media only talked about the picture and the title...it's because the article is boring. If you look at Attachment Parenting and at Dr. William Sears on Wikipedia, you will pretty much get the concept.

Instead of writing a boring review on a boring article, I will share my experience with AP (it is also a fun little exercise on a personal level).  

I realized we were doing AP when Alice was a couple months old. In my part of the world, based on my personal knowledge and my friend Wikipedia, there is not a French term for AP. I'm sure many parents are doing it simply by following their instincts...this was our case.

This doesn't make me a better mom. Actually, it makes me a lazy mom because AP is the easiest, laziest and simplest way to raise a baby. This is why...

According to Time magazine, AP has three pillars (but AP is so much more than that) which includes breastfeeding, co-sleeping and baby wearing.

Breastfeeding: Sterilizing baby bottles (and canning jars if I ever make jam) freaks me out. We don't have enough counter space in our kitchen for a bottle dryer. Choosing formula looks complicated and pricey. I solved many potential crisis by giving Alice a boob since she is a daredevil with daily failed stunts. It gives me a well deserved moment of peace! I can talk on the phone without interruption. I can't stand the sound of a crying baby (not the noise itself but it seems that I'm biologically programmed to give an immediate nurturing response to ANY baby cries) and since Alice never had a pacifier, breastfeeding her was the solution.  

Co-sleeping: I sleep naked (hoping to solve that "problem" before Alice is too old) and walking back and forth during a Canadian winter was not an option. I enjoy the idea of having all living creatures sleeping in the same bedroom (humans and pets). I love to look at Alice when she sleeps...because she moves a lot during the day! Sleeping, even with a baby attached to my boob, is much easier than spending numerous nights "sleep training" her.

Baby wearing: We use public transportation 95% of the time and, between you and me, strollers and public transportation are not very compatible. Baby wearing makes walking my dog a charm since he has a tendency to find himself under the stroller. Opening doors in various restaurants and stores while operating a stroller require too much coordination. I gesticulate a lot when I talk...can't do that with a stroller. You can't hold an umbrella and push a stroller efficiently at the same time. And don't get me started on strollers in 10 inches of snow!     

Seriously, AP (or whatever you want to call it) worked very well for us. However, by moments, I feel a bit like a quiet black sheep. For example, I preferred to remain silent when my mom friends talked about sleep training or breastfeeding night weaning. On the positive side, this forced me to focus on my mom instinct even more.

Finally, what I like the most about AP is that I have the feeling that we are a team. I often see families trying to follow strict routine dictated by some "baby trainer" that gives the impression that the baby is against the parents. Maybe it is AP, maybe it some chemical in the air, maybe Alice is the reincarnation of an hyper monk but I can count on my two hands how often she got pissed off over the past 14 months...after all, AP is also called Peaceful Parenting!
  

 

 

 

 part 3: AP into toddlerhood 

AP and me - part 1

 

 

I finally got my hands on the Time magazine edition that created such a big controversy over the past few days.

Personally, I think the picture is awesome because it is not your usual nurturing mother image. Between you and me, when I feed Alice in the middle of the night I definitely look more like a wasted alcoholic than a delicate woman gazing lovingly at her child!

Some people mentioned they felt that the image had a sexual connotation. Maybe it is the hormones in my IUD but I find nothing sexual in that picture (but I get the concept, ah!). However, it got me thinking. Would the reaction be the same if it was a little girl? Would it be more or less shocking?

From what I understand, most mothers believe that the title was more controversial than the picture...and I'm not talking about the God of Cricket (title at the top right of the magazine). I find that reaction very interesting on a social point of view.

I think that in most industrialized countries, women lost their ability to follow their maternal instincts. Of course, this doesn't make them less of a good mother. No matter how you decide to raise your kids (attachment parenting or not) the vast majority (I can't say 100% of mothers because, lets face it, there are some extreme situations that require the help of social services!) of women are definitely  "mom enough".

However, if women were a bit more confident about their ability to be a mother, that magazine title would be like water off a duck's back. If less books, blogs (!) and forums were read by mothers and if more time was invested in following what really feel "right" for their family...well, Time magazine (USA) would have a completely different cover story (maybe one about the God of Cricket - South Pacific cover).

Individualism, lack of self esteem and perfectionism transformed motherhood into a very lucrative business...Dr. Sears and all the other baby books writers are living proof.

I often questioned myself like most people but coming from somebody who had her load of shitty self esteem until recently, I applauded myself (sounds extremely pretentious but I won't silence this  accomplishment after so many years of personal insecurities) for following my mother's instinct with Alice even when things got a bit more rocky (and hopefully into toddlerhood). 

The business degree graduate in me says Touché Time magazine for choosing that picture and that title. Time magazine is obviously not a non profit organization. Generating money by selling copies is their number 1 goal.

On the other hand, Time magazine re-opened the debate on breastfeeding in North America (and Attachment Parenting but the elephant in the room was obviously breastfeeding) but I'm still not sure who will be the winner in the end (Did it ridicule or applaud women doing extended breastfeeding?)...except Time magazine!

part 2: my toughs on the article and AP in my family

I will be back soon...

...I went to get TIME magazine!!!